7 Weeks

Baby's now the size of a blueberry! 

Baby's brain -- both hemispheres! -- is growing fast, generating about one hundred new cells every minute. Arms and legs are emerging as joints start to form, and a permanent set of kidneys (baby's third!) is now in place.

How far along? 7 weeks 2 days(ish)
Pregnancy Symptoms: sore boobs, exhaustion, stuffy nose, extreme thirst, occasional heartburn and nausea.... and now i come in extra bitchy mode too (only when i'm hungry or tired, which is all the time.) Still no real morning sickness, which has me worried.
Sleep: What's that?
Best moment this week: finding out my co-worker is pregnant too! Now i don't have to get fat by myself
Worst moment this week: my work pants are already too tight and i'm already gaining weight and getting a belly
Movement: i'm too lazy to do anything except lay on the couch and i think Peanut feels the same way
Food cravings: none, but some foods are becoming less appealing...no gagging though
Gender: according to the wedding-ring-over-the-belly test it's a girl when i do it and no response when jake does it
What I miss: seeing Peanut on an ultrasound or hearing a heartbeat....do you think Tom Cruise would lend me his ultrasound machine??
What I am looking forward to: i changed my appointment to next Thursday the 4th because Jake will be on a ski trip the following week and i want him to come with me
My best kept secret this week: None! I finally told everyone at work....only to find out that *every* person already knew. I didn't get to surprise anybody :(

How to Tell Your Co-Workers You're Pregnant

Jake made me a cute way to tell everyone at work i'm pregnant. I'm going to post it today since everyone pretty much already figured it out. :)

Fetal Doppler Take Two

I think there's either an ocean or an alien in my belly. It most certainly wasn't a Peanut heartbeat. The sounds made me giggle and the doppler picked it up and my giggles sounded so funny in electronic version that i started laughing hysterically. So until i can hear Peanut i at least can use it for my own amusement. I've been really curious how well i could hear Dala's heartbeat on it....i haven't tried it yet cuz i don't think she'd like the goo i'd have to squirt on her. She's pretty tolerant of us bugging her all the time, so i'm trying to decide if she'd be still long enough for me to slime her and listen to her heart.

*UPDATE* I tried it without any goo. She just looked at me like i was crazy and then tried to bite the wand. Without goo i didn't hear any kitty heartbeats :(

I'm Already an Awful Mother!

I threw Peanut's first ultrasound pictures away!! It was an accident, of course, but i feel awful. Amanda was over Monday to watch the Bachelor. We were enjoying some pizza and garlic knots and after the show Amanda asked to see the ultrasound pictures. As i was searching through my purse i had a sudden realization...they had been "protected" inside one of the receipts from my doctors office....and that afternoon i had just thrown a bunch of uneeded receipts and junk paper away! I rushed to the trashcan and luckily the ultrasounds were fine. If Amanda hadn't been there and asked to see them i would have lost them forever!!

I received the fetal doppler in the mail! I decided to mess around with it and see if it was working. I put in the batteries and it turned on fine. As expected, there were no sounds whatsoever on my belly. In fact, it kept turning off every 60 seconds because nothing was happening. So i decided i'd listen to my own heartbeat to see how the doppler worked. Only apparently i don't have a heartbeat either? I tried one last place....the carotid artery on my neck (this is actually a common place that doctors use a doppler). Still nothing! I finally got the bright idea to unplug the wand and plug it back in, which fixed it! I can't hear any Peanut heartbeats, but i could hear mine just fine. I can already tell this is going to be addicting when i can finally hear baby!

6 Weeks

Baby's now the size of a sweet pea!
Growing like crazy, baby is starting to sprout eyes, ears, nose, cheeks, and chin. Those little hands and feet -- still webbed like paddles -- might wiggle by week's end, the heart is beating (almost twice as fast as yours!), and blood is starting to circulate.

How far along? 6 weeks 1 day (or 6w4d, it's up for discussion)
Pregnancy Symptoms: sore boobs, bone-crushing exhaustion, stuffy nose, occasional heartburn and nausea
Sleep: About the same....i actually go to bed a lot earlier now but still wake up multiple times a night and nap throughout the day if i'm not working. I've been having some crazy dreams!
Best moment this week: my first ultrasound!
Movement: we saw the beginning flickers of a heartbeat on the ultrasound
Food cravings: nothing special this week....i seem to *not* be craving sweets as much, which is an absolute first
Gender: it still feels like a girl
What I miss: normalcy
What I am looking forward to: getting my fetal doppler next week. I know it's way too early to hear a heartbeat, but of course i'll try anyway. You know, just to make sure it works. :P My first appointment with the new doctor is Feb 8th....so far away!
My best kept secret this week: I'm more excited now that i had the ultrasound but it's starting to sink in. I'm secretly terrified and have that "Oh shit, what have i done?" feeling. I don't know if i'm ready for this!!

It's a Peanut!

Since i'm lazy and uncreative I'm just going to steal Amanda's name for my baby...Peanut! Today i went for my early ultrasound. It didn't take too long for them to locate little Peanut and even though it's tiny, they were able to visualize (no sound) the heartbeat! I'm now being released to see an OB, so i have to make my appointment to go see them in a couple weeks. I'm trying to figure out how to get another ultrasound so that i can hear the heartbeat at least. I guess i'll just ask and see what they say.

On the September babyboard there are two other girls that were on low-dose Clomid like me and just had their ultrasounds....one is having triplets and the other twins!! I'm soooo glad i didn't come across those posts until *after* my ultrasound! I went ahead and ordered a fetal doppler from Amazon (even though i know it's too early to use yet) because it said "only 1 left in stock...order soon!" I ordered the same one as Jenny but the picture that shows up on my "completed order" page is a totally different thing than what is on the product page. I hope they send me the right thing because the *incorrect* picture is just a glorified microphone--you sit it on your belly with headphones...there's no doppler to it. It should come on Monday so i guess we'll find out then.

Oh! It's also worth mentioning that my doctor and i disagree about my due date. With all the dang charting i did i *know* when i ovulated and by my calculations my due date is September 17. My doctor estimated me at September 12. So i guess sometime that week i'll be having a baby!

Boobs and Body Pillows

For the first time in my life i have real cleavage!! It's so exciting! I'm sure i'll be eating crow in a few months when they're ginormous, but as someone who's always had small boobs and had to use a pushup bra, this is fascinating stuff. Coincidentally, i now have a new problem. I wake up every single night (in addition to pee breaks! geez) because my arms or hands are numb and tingly as if they've fallen asleep. This appears to be a common phenomenon according to others on the babyboard, but the only reason i can think of for it happening so early is because my boobs are sooo sore that i sleep on top of my arms to keep my boobs from getting squished into the bed. I'm thinking about getting a body pillow to see if that might help. Any experiences or suggestions to share?

Sleep Does A Body Good

What a difference sleep makes! I worked all weekend and wasn't getting nearly enough sleep when i wrote my last post. (And by the way, getting up to pee in the middle of the night when it's cold and you're exhausted *sucks*) I'm feeling much, much better now that i've had 2 good nights of sleep and naps in-between. Well, emotionally anyway. I've been having the occasional nausea attack. Not nearly enough to throw up, but i don't like the queasy feeling. The next few weeks ought to be fun!

5 Weeks

Stealing another great idea from Jenny! A weekly pregnancy questionnaire:

How far along? 5 weeks 2 days
Pregnancy Symptoms: sore boobs, cramps, bone-crushing exhaustion, stuffy nose
Sleep: I'm tired all the time and all i want to do is sleep, but when i finally go to bed for the night i wake up several times throughout the night before finally giving up after 5-6 hours
Best moment this week: finding out my hCG is still rising like normal
Movement: cramps and pains that freak me out
Food cravings: cheese danish! I sent jake to 3 different krogers in search of them one day...they are so freaking yummy
Gender: it feels like a girl this week
What I miss: not worrying about things that never crossed my mind before, like Diet Coke.
What I am looking forward to: my ultrasound next Thursday
My best kept secret this week: is definitely not my pregnancy. Too many people know!

I feel like i should be exuberant and excited and bouncy now that i'm finally pregnant. Instead i feel exhausted and terrified and depressed. And i feel *guilty* for feeling that way. I wish i could be naive and not worry, but it's been a long road so far. I've had it much easier than many, mind you. It only took 10 months and two rounds of Clomid, it could have been a lot worse, but i *was* naive about the ease of getting pregnant. I never in my wildest dreams imagined such a long journey and it's made me very.....cynical i guess. I don't want to let myself get excited or hopeful yet. It's still very early and too much can happen. I tried to join a babyboard to see what was going on with other girls due in September and try to get more excited but instead it's freaking me out too much with all the "I'm spotting!" posts (and worse) so i've mostly stopped visiting. I find myself "talking me down" if i start getting too excited. How crazy is that?? It's just that i know if i told a bunch of people (work, facebook, etc) and talked about it openly and then something happened.....i'd be absolutely crushed. It's easier to just go about business as usual and pretend nothing has changed. (And GB you have no idea how awful i feel when i think how i kept asking when you'd get pregnant last Christmas. You should have slapped me!) Hmm....maybe i should add hormones to my symptoms list.....

Swine Flu

Ok ok, i did it. I got the vaccine. That was one of the questions i asked my doctor about and he said i should "Absolutely get it right away" There is speculation that the swine flu may peak again in the spring (last April/May was the beginning of the epidemic) and since i have the extra concern of workplace exposure i figured i might as well start working on that immunity. I told Jake he has to get one too...he's thrilled.

I think i may actually have some immunity from work and here's why: Every time a new person starts at the pharmacy they're sick *all* the time. Which is obvious, since all we do is hang out around the sicklies. However, once you've worked there for a few months.....you rarely ever get sick. It's like magic! I'm still beyond boggled by how not a single one of us in the pharmacy has gotten the flu this year (or usually any year), especially since we've been dealing with two different kinds. In fact the only time i got sick this year was when Jake got sick and gave it to me. He's such a butthead.

Totally random question: On the babyboards people were talking about toxoplasmosis and cats. Apparently if you've owned cats awhile there's a good chance you've had it before and are immune, and that you can be tested by your OB for that immunity or infection. If currently infected you can be treated with antibiotics. I don't have anything to do with the litter anymore, but is the testing something y'all did?

I Just Want An Ultrasound!

At today's doctor appointment i didn't get an ultrasound. I was pretty disappointed. He did an exam and said "You're definitely pregnant" and then i asked him a bunch of questions about things like how much caffeine i can have, if i'm allowed to highlight my hair, are the prenatal vitamins i'm taking good enough, will Diet Coke kill my baby. You know, the usual. I haven't had the sharp pains in a couple days now, so i'm starting to calm down a little. Dr. Stephens thinks it's just round ligament pains, but i was surprised since i read those usually don't start until second trimester. Blood levels were good today!
hCG=3635 Doubling time~42 hours

I'm glad the doubling time slowed down, when it was so fast last week i was worried it meant multiples! I guess it still could be, though. So here's the new plan: I have an ultrasound next Thursday. I'll be 5w6d or 6w0d. The nurse tried to get me to wait until the following week so that i wouldn't be scared if they don't find a heartbeat next week. She said their ultrasound is old school, like from the 70s, that's it's not hi-tech 3D kind or anything. The thing is, though, i read that you can see the heartbeat around the time your hCG hits 6,000. Well that will be by tomorrow morning for me. So if i'm not even going for an ultrasound for almost a week after that, i should definitely be able to see something. And if they *don't* see a heartbeat next week i'll know that it's still early, and they'll just do another one the next week. It sounds like a good plan to me, but i'm sure i will worry a little if i don't hear it next week. But waiting stresses me out too! Right now i just want to confirm that everything is in the right place and where it should be. Do you think it's a mistake to get the ultrasound next week?

On a side note...when can the home fetal doppler pick up the heartbeat and what brands are good?

Nervous

I've made it a whole week and a half! Nine months is going to be a looooong time...

I'm still freaking out about everything so i have an appointment in the morning with my doctor. I've been having cramping this whole time, which can be normal, but i've also developed some sharp shooting pains that radiate from my right lower abdomen to my thigh. They're quick, but they're sharp enough to take my breath away. I took my last hCG test today so those results should be available tomorrow as well. I'm taking Jake with me to my appointment in the hopes that they're going to do an ultrasound to make sure everything is ok. It makes me nervous that i don't really have many pregnancy symptoms. Right now sore boobs is about it.

The past couple days i've been tired and kind of blue feeling. It probably has a lot to do with the fact that i could *not* put down my book (The Host by Stephenie Meyer....so good!!) and therefore got very little sleep and then worked all day for 2 days in a row. Maybe it's pregnancy hormones too, who knows. Today was my day off so i could have slept in but instead i woke up after 5-6 hours and couldn't get back to sleep. Blah.

Internets Are Evil

Have i mentioned i love my GYN? I wish he still delivered. I'll see him for my first ultrasound and then will move on to an OB. He has his own practice so i only see him and he has 2 main nurses that are there every day. Angie is the one that has been so sweet because she knows how nervous i am. She looked up my lab results and called me first thing this morning. So to recap:
9DPO hCG= 73
11DPO hCG=225

So far my levels are doubling every 31 hours or 1.3 days, and it needed to double about every 48 hours. My doctor says this looks like a good pregnancy and i tentatively have an ultrasound scheduled for Feb 3rd. I don't know if i can wait that long! I'm going back for one more hCG test sometime next week, but mainly because i asked if i could.

So even though i'm only 13 days past conception i'm already in my 3rd-4th week of pregnancy. The doctors go by last menstrual period (LMP), which puts me at 4weeks+4days. I know i ovulated late, however, so my *corrected* date is 3w6d. I've noticed a lot more symptoms the past few days and the cramps are driving me nuts. They can be pretty intense sometimes, which worries me, but so far no spotting so i'm trying to remain calm. My boobs feel like they're going to fall off. But most importantly, i'm still worried something will happen. So this is my new dilemma: Do the ultrasound in a *month* when i'll be at least 7-8 weeks along and a heartbeat should be a sure thing, OR do it a week earlier but it may be too early for a heartbeat. Angie recommends the 7-8 week ultrasound so that i don't get freaked out if i do it too early and can't see the heartbeat. However, at the moment my fears are things like ectopic pregnancy. So if i did it a week earlier i could at least see that the baby is where it should be, and still probably hear a heartbeat. What do y'all think? Unfortunately the internet is evil and filled with all the things that could possibly go wrong and that's what i have running through my head. I hate worrying! Why is it i wanted to get pregnant again?

Test Results

So much new information! I got the results of my blood tests:
Progesterone= 121.5 (normal= 9-47)
HCG= 73 (normal is relative, but needs to be at least >25)

At first i was obsessed with why my progesterone level is so high. I spent *hours* looking at anything and everything online. Twins (please no!), Ectopic, Molar pregnancy. It could mean a number of things, or it may just be my normal, or it may go down to "normal." However, when i talked to my doctor today he seemed completely unconcerened with it. It's high enough to sustain a pregnancy, so he's not going to repeat the test.

My HCG, however, is pretty low. Yes it's above 25, but most would be 150-250 on first check. This could be because i tested so early (this blood was drawn the same day i got the VERY faint line on the pee test/HPT) or it could mean that it's not going to stick. The only way to tell is to see if the number doubles every 2-3 days. So today i went for my second blood test and should get the results tomorrow. Let's hope for at least 150+!!

Ok so that's the scientific stuff. Here's my craziness input.

Reasons I'm Hopeful:
1) Positive line is noticeably darker
2) No spotting
3) Good progesterone test
4) Sore boobs and a tiny bit of nausea

Reasons I'm Scared:
1) Day 11 line is lighter/same as Day 10
2) Cramps
3) Temps down & low HCG
4) I'm not to the day when it would be a "missed period" yet

I followed Jenny's advice. I went to Dollar Tree and bought seven (yes, seven) pregnancy tests. They must have thought i was nuts, but i can't believe they're only $1! I came home and took one immediately to compare to this morning's test and the doctor's test from Monday. It's a pretty light line, about the same as the doctor's test from Monday. Which makes me nervous. Shouldn't it be getting darker every day? However, it was in the middle of the day after i'd eaten and i made a point to drink a lot of water so it was probably also a more dilute sample. I'll try again in the morning.

Maybe Baby?

Today I went to the doctor to talk to him about my Clomid trial and the awful adbominal pain i'd had. I needed to get my yearly exam and a progesterone level (to determine if i ovulated) anyway, so i figured i'd kill 3 birds with one stone. I'm efficient like that. Anyway, i decided that even though today is only 9DPO that i'd go ahead and take a pregnancy test. And there was a very very VERY faint second line! So i took that with me to the doctor and he did a test too...and again i got a very faint positive! Since it's still early my doctor ordered a blood pregnancy test. This actually measures a number of the hormone hCG, and if you are pregnant and it "sticks" this number should double every 3 days in the beginning. So i had that drawn today (should find out tomorrow or Weds) and i will have it re-drawn in 3 days to determine if it will "stick". So i'm guardedly hopeful but mostly nervous. I know there are a lot of reasons it may not "stick" and Clomid adds a couple more problems to the pile. Until then...i'm crossing my fingers!!


The top is my home test from this morning and the bottom is the doctor's office test.

Clomid Trial

My first Clomid cycle was a bust. I don't really know what happened, so we just tried the same thing again. This cycle something definitely happened. I was fine all through the 5 days of pills, but then all of a sudden on Christmas week (about a week later) i started having awful abdominal pain. I thought it might be appendicitis it hurt so bad at times. The only reason i didn't ever go to the ER was because i didnt have a fever, nausea, or any other symptoms.....and it was also around the time i was supposed to be ovulating. That lasted about 4 days and then went away. So now i'm mostly fine except my boobs hurt like crazy. I'm going to see the doctor Monday to tell him about the abdominal pain. I'm hoping he'll do an ultrasound or something and see if maybe i have a cyst (a possible side effect of the Clomid). I can't decide if i want to try another cycle of Clomid or skip a month and do all the bloodwork and things instead. I wonder if i could do both at the same time? I guess i'll find out on Monday.

Christmas

Christmas was soooo exhausting. Tuesday we went to Grandmom's because my aunt, uncle, and cousins were in town and she was going back to North Carolina with them. We were there really late but we had a good time. Grandmom got her first ever digital camera. I hope she learns how to use it! I got Teddy some puppy stairs. He wasn't thrilled with them. Instead he'd just put his paws on the bed and bark to be picked up. We did get him to use it a couple of times though, so maybe Grandmom can train him.

Wednesday we had Christmas at my house with Mom, Phillip, Jefferey, Kristyn, myself, and Jake. We had a freakin' ton of presents! I got a new computer chair, an awesome electric throw blanket (which i'm currently using since it's -500F outside), a spiffy-cool George Foreman grill, new sheets, some tupperware, and a million more things! It was an awesome day. The boys all got remote-controlled ferraris and they played with them for HOURS.

Christmas Eve we had to get up at the ass-crack of dawn to drive to Ellijay and meet Jake's mom and sister at IHOP. His mom looked really good and Joe (her husband) was not obnoxious like he normally is. It was also Eve's birthday and the IHOP girls sang Happy Birthday to her. Other than getting up so early, we had a nice time! From there we went to Jake's aunt's house for his dad's side of the family Christmas. We had brunch and his cousin made this cinnamon-roll french toast bread pudding that was soooooo good. I need to get that recipe!

Christmas Day we got up early again to go to Dad's. I got Wii Fit! I've been using it pretty consistently, but i've also been eating horribly. It yells at me and tells me i'm fat. It's all about the motivation. I got Katie this SingIt video game. We rocked out on that, although it was mostly Jonas Brothers/Hannah Montana/Demi Lovato so i didn't really know a ton of those songs. It made me really want Guitar Hero or Rock Band or something for the Wii. I'll have to see if i can get any of that stuff used from Gamestop.

So after 4 days of Christmas i was soooo exhausted. I had to work the rest of the weekend, and getting up early sucked. Needless to say i passed out Sunday night and slept for hours.